Going Grey
For many women one of the biggest public markers of getting old is going grey. How this happens varies enormously with the individual with some finding their first grey hair in their twenties and other still not grey in their seventies. Attitudes vary enormously too, with some continuing to colour their hair all their life and others embracing their new grey persona.
Personally I have gone for a middle way. When I was about 50 I realised that my hair was going to go rather a nice shade of grey, silver even. So I decided that when it was pretty much all grey I would stop colouring it. This was not the decision most of my contemporaries were coming to and I guess a factor is that I have always admired older women with beautifully coiffed grey hair. Think Honor Blackman here.
When I was about 55 I took the plunge I stopped colouring my hair. The results were immediate I got offered seats on the underground, people in shops asked if I qualified for a pensioner discount. It was as if I as an individual didn’t exist anymore, I had become invisible underneath my crown of grey.
What to do? I didn’t really want to go back to colouring my hair but I didn’t much like what was happening so I needed a solution. In the past I had been quite experimental with hair colour trying different coloured highlights. So after consultation with my hairdresser we I decided on a few bright pink highlights – I just love bright colours. The rest as they say is history and I haven’t looked back.
What has really surprised me though is the number of random strangers who tell be how much they like my hair. I’m talking shop assistants, strangers at the theatre and most surprisingly, when I have been travelling, street food vendors or people riding past on scooters.
“It dawned on me that one of the reasons older women are invisible is because so many dye their hair to cover the grey”
Ashton Applewhite
This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto Against Ageism
Celebrating positive ageing. Having fun engaging with my creativity, seeking new adventures and following my dreams. 
I too have gone the grey route although I’m now white ! I’ve always loved your highlights Barbara I couldn’t imagine you without them !
Thanks Viv I really think grey and white look great
Barb – I have never colored my hair, but it is still quite dark and natural color with probably 25% of diffused grey. I think it has been hard since around 55 going forward (I’ll be 60 in January) seeing the no longer deniable changes of aging in myself. We live in a society where age-ism is alive and well…and the availability of cosmetic surgery has compounded the issue. I would love to find a support group where we support each other in the last quarter of our lives. Great article! Love your hair…always have!!!
I think a support group sounds such a good idea Denise. Maybe it could be virtual?
I embraced my grey when I was 49 and I haven’t regretted it for these last 15 years. The back of my head is just now starting to turn from brown (a rather nice brown – as it turned out) to grey. It will take a while (if ever) to go completely grey like the rest. As long as two colors work well together, I’m happy.
Sounds good to me Carol
Barbara, I love your pink streaked hair. I remember reading somewhere that woman said, now that she’s older, she will wear purple, and spit if she wants to. Somehow, that stuck with me. My own curly hair has turned a surprising bright white color, for which I’m glad, but I wasn’t when I let it grow out. Then it was mousy brown and two-toned. I’ll never forget, when I flew to Arizona to visit my mom and sisters after it turned, they looked at me and asked if the hair was dyed. It felt good to say no, to not have to go through the coloring process any more!.
no roots to worry about is just so good!